Everything's so screwed up. I can't figure out why.





I didn't want to leave my blog left out, but-
I am sick so I'm posting tomorrow.
Chao!

A picture of terriblely pretty Viven Liegh
from the "Gone with the Wind".
I was just web surfing and found this.
Thought Ellora might like it%^^
I like her better with the dark hair.

[Some things]

1.
Quit Field Hockey. How depressing.

2.
What is wrong with saying "Macbeth"?

3.
I went to this audition for the fall play, and
Mr.Murphy wouldn't show any emotion on
his face till I finished the first part...

G1: Uhm... I'm sorry, but can you smile(smile
on my face) a bit, please? I'm just nervous and
it's a bit scary if you're sitting there with a face
saying "Hmm".

Mr.Murphy(if this is the right spelling) looked
at me and suddenly started to laugh and said
sorry. I mean, then I felt sorry!

Whatever. I really sucked though.

4.
Last time I met Mr.Bowdy in the CB library and
he was asking about me and Lizz's summer.

Lizz: It was fine! Amazing! (Looking at me)
JiWon knows why.

and Mr.Bowdy said
"Why, you fell in love with each other?"

...Mr.Bowdy is just hilarious.
Never thought a teacher would say that.
He likes to tease me I guess!

5.
I need to lose weight.
I don't want my mom to be mad at me again when
I go back home for winter.
But Field Hockey was just too much for me.
Unfortunately- no soy deportista.
Depressing, isn't it? Again.

6.
Blah!

7.
I want to sing!
-cold. (caugh)

8.
(sigh)

9.
Ah- I want to learn Macbeth.
But again- Why can't I say 'Macbeth' out loud?
Is it some kind of superstition of bad luck?

10.
Chao!

P.S:
If you meet this one person in the hallway,
or this person says hello to you, or this person
was talking to you and suddenly smiled, and
you feel happy no matter what you were feeling,
is it a good thing?
But it's surely making me happy.
Very interesting. You see, Ma? I'm not a dry person
at all.%^^

[Tada-]

I might quit field hockey.
There's nothing I can do.
I'm depressed... a bit long story.
It's sad though. There were lots of people
I like(though some, not as much) and I do
like Ms.Duke... but somehow-

Whatever. I'll sleep like a dead tonight and
everything's gonna be all fine.



-I hope.

[Weekend]

I can't believe it; the weekend was so short!
Blah, I was sick(or at least not feeling well) all weekend
but one thing nice is that pain tortured me pretty much
went away since this noon. Hurray!

I mean... I've got no money for quite a while which makes
me sad. I'd like to watch a movie but don't know what to.

And I just feel like I want to read all day, sometimes taking
a nice walk, and live that way forever. Maybe I'm just
being lazy? But I feel like a "teenage girl" these days.

I mean, it's a bit of an awkward feeling; I feel like I'm
finally going through the stage of growing! I became a
bit more sentimental which is not always good for me
in that sometimes it prevent me from concentrating
only in school work....




But it's not a bad feeling at all, really.
It's just that... on the other side, I became more
realistic than I used to be, and often times that's
making me a bit depressed; what am I gonna do
and what am I gonna be? What am I doing NOW
anyway?

This dorm is making me crazy.
Need some outdoor air. But it's study hall and I
cannot. Chao!

[Crap, Cramp!]

Well, it was my first field hockey practice of the year and
it was challenging, yes, but what should I say...
I got a huge cramp, AFTER the practice.

I was walking down the field trying to get a ride and all of
a sudden I just collapsed because my legs weren't working
properly(well, though i should ask myself 'did it ever work
properly anyway?)... and I couldn't stand up. I'm serious.
It really DID hurt! I almost felt like I'm gonna cry!

Fortunately Ms.Duke came right away and helped me, and
tought me some exercises I can do in the dorms to make it
better; I felt thankful and sorry at the same time for her
because I took a lot of her time when she needed to go to the
meeting. Maybe SHE DOESN'T hate me! %^^

Well, so right now I have a lot of difficulties walking up and
down the stairs, and worried about the bunk bed since I
got the top- but oh, well. Hope this gets better.

And I am really excited to call my mom; I can't believe I
didn't call her for more than a week! I was really busy and
couldn't get the phone card, but I got today, yaha!

I'm happy. Verrrrrrrrrrrry happy. After study hall I'm
gonna run up and call her. But before that I have work
duty; Oh, what a joy.

Crap, I'm so tired. Field Hockey was still fun no matter how
I suck, but it doesn't soothe the tiredness, I guess!%^^
And I like my history class; maybe not the 'class', but what
we're learning. The Byzantine Empire and the Crusades!
And the Empire of Muslims, especially the Seljuk Turks!
Happy, happy.
Well, Chao. Chao, Chao, Chao.


Chao!

[How's school going?]

If someone asks me that question, I might just go
"grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr......"!

I'm feeling a lot busier than last year; of course
that's true, but I just feel even more exhausted
than I should be.

Not that the school's bad; I'm EVEN okay with
the dorms! But I just feel like I don't have any
time I can use by myself just drawing or reading
something and have fun.

I didn't feel this way last year. Was it just because
I'm not used to the school schedule yet? Or is it
just that it's always this way but I didn't study
enough last year?%^^ (it might be the latter)

And I have so much work to do during the weekend.




I'm just a bit upset that Master and Margarita, the first
book written in English I actually decided to read when it's
not realated to school(though it's originally written in Russian
and the English version's the translated one) arrived but
I don't have time to read it for quite a while.

And I finally started actually reading the english homework
stuff! -And realized what a slacker I was.

Ahaha. From tomorrow, joyous(blah) field hockey begins.
Oh, torture! I'm not made to run the hills! Whatever.
Hope I get used to it soon!

jdfkjadklfjadklfjkadghakdjfkj I've got nothing special to say
today. Just upset that this new book I ordered from Korea
isn't going to arrive till NEXT weekend; it makes me a bit
angry when I payed so much for it!

[What Makes Me Happy]

1. I took the bus with, had lunch with, and sat next to
Ellora. I mean, it's been a long time since we did it-
due to stupid new schedule. Whatever.

2. My medical form finally arrived and now I can join
field hockey; though I'm not sure if it's actually making
me happy or rather upset. %^^

3. There is this series of books I'm reading(in Korean)
and the 8th volume came out yesterday; though I need
to wait more than a week to get it, I just heard that Argon,
this character I'm obssessed with didn't die! Hurray!
(Usually, the character I love always dies... Darn.)

I mean, he's poor and he mails himself by DHL service
to save money for the plane ticket to Russia. And he's
just so hilarious; I was really really depressed to read
the 7th volume because it ended with a scene where
this one guy was about to kill him- and now I'm not
worried anymore! Hurray!

I mean, I AM worried because the shipping will cost
me a lot of money, but it's worth it. I spend half of my
day thinking about it. It makes me high, and it's surely
like a drug! Well, guess I'll have to calm down so I can
finish my homework.

4. ..................................................................Is there any more?



P.S: I'm planning on going to Birmingham this Friday.
And some of my school books and maybe the books I
ordered for my joy(like Master and Margarita) might
arrive tomorrow... that wast the 4th one. Chao!

[Things]

I can't WRITE in English. Seriously! I was writing about
this... thing like 'is the First Crusade important in Our modern
Society?' ; I actually wanted to write "at least at school!"

OF COURSE i didn't, but I don't remember what I wrote
either. It's sad that I can't write. I still feel so stupid everytime
I try to write something in English. Whatever.

Ooh, I need to go to Birmingham. But I'm totally broke cuz
I ordered lots of books in Amazon.com like "Middlesex" or
"Master and Margarita" - dfkjadkfhadkhfkla

But I guess I'll have enough money to go and get thai food
for this once. After that I'm broke for a while- I spent over
$200 buying books I want to read, mostly in English and
some in Korean, and I'm broke, yes.
The only nice thing is that my dad doesn't care about money
spent in books, and therefore he won't get made at me least-
not that he gives tons of extra money for it, but still.

Hope I can read it all(about 20 books) throughout the school
year... I hope.

[The Tear Drinking Bird]

I was reading this Korean fantasy novel named
The Tear Drinking Bird by an author I really like.
I just wanted to post a poorly translated version
(I'm really bad at writing in English you know) of
the part I like.



"Before we say good bye, I'd like to tell you a story, Bihyeong.
It's an old story of the Kitalzer Hunters. Is it okay for you?"

"Huh? Yes, what is it?"

"There are four brother birds. They all differ in what the prefer
to eat. Water, blood, poison and tears. The one that lives the
longest is the blood drinking bird. Then what would be the one
that lives the shortest?"
.
.
.
.
"Yes. The reason the blood drinking bird has the longest life
span is because it drinks what one would never want to lose.
On the other hand, tear is what you lose and dump it outside
your body. How harmful would it be to be dumped like that?
It's natrual to live shortly when you drink such a thing, but."

"But?"

"They say the tear drinking bird sings most beautifully of the four."
.
.
.
.
"The blood drinking bird lives the longest. It drinks the precious
thing that one never wants to give away. But because of that
smell of the blood, no one comes around it."



It has four volumes and I didn't finish reading it yet.
This short story that Keigun tells Bihyung says that a king should
be a one who can drink the tears of his people. One who craves
for his people's blood, craving just for money and power is no king.
And the king must will to die first instead of sacrificing his people.

I actually didn't get to this part yet, but this part was what made
me decide to read it; and there was this other book which viewed
the flow of the time in an interesting way I really loved by the same
author. That one had a western background but this one's mostly
oriental. I'm enjoying it.